8 Ways to Boost Bonding With Baby

Babies bond in a number of ways, mostly through touch and smell. Bonding (or attachment) is the sense of connection between parents and infants that forms the foundation of the parent-child relationship. Here are some ways to do it well.

Holding, talking, singing, rocking, cuddling and other nurturing interactions between you and your baby are bonding experiences that strengthen the emotional connection between both of you. They also strengthen your infant's learning connections.

For most parents bonding is an immediate response, which happens during the first hours or days of life. For your baby however, the attachment is not instant. It forms gradually and is established over time. A secure attachment develops from predictable, responsive, and nurturing care giving. Promptly responding to your baby's needs in a loving manner will help him develop a strong sense of trust in you, himself, and his environment. But, besides the basic care-giving activities--feeding, diapering, rocking--there are additional ways to bond with your baby. These interactive tips will help you deepen your relationship and enrich your earliest times together.

1. Provide your baby with plenty of face-to-face interaction.
   Bring your face close to your baby's and gaze into each other's eyes. Your smiling face, changing expressions, and loving voice will captivate him.
2. Loving touches nourish your baby's emotional development and improve sensory awareness.
   Gently kiss and stroke your baby whenever you dress or change her. As your baby is feeding, caress her cheeks, shoulders, and arms. Gently rub her delicate little hands and fingers. Baby massage relaxes, reduces stress, and helps your infant to sleep.
3. Skin-to-skin contact is soothing and comforting for both of you.
   Hold your baby against your chest and breathe slowly. The warmth of your body, the smell of your skin, and the beating of your heart are very reassuring. You can also treat your baby to a soothing bath with you.
4. Talk to your baby!
   Don't worry about sounding silly. Involve him in your activities by talking about everything that you do. Once your baby's starts cooing and making sounds, respond to his growing vocabulary by repeating those sounds back to him.
5. Sing to your baby!
   What better way to express your love and joy? Even if you think your singing is not the best; it's the best to your baby (hey, how often do you get a captive audience?). Don't limit yourself to lullabies or nursery rhymes--sing whatever makes you happy. Your baby will love the effort and attention.
6. Look for all the playful opportunities as you go through your care-giving routines.
   You don't need expensive toys to play with your baby--You are her most important toy. Help your baby learn and explore the world during these early months by making her toys and her world come alive.
7. Play soothing music and gently dance with your baby around the room.
   Babies make great dancing partners. They love the music, the movement, and the closeness to you.
8. Reading is a wonderful way to bond with your baby while developing language skills.
   Start with large books that have simple bold illustrations. Cradle your baby in your arms and let him experience the closeness that reading a book provides.

© 2002 Susan Stelfox.
Susan Stelfox is the author of Baby Be Loved: Growing and Learning Together During the First 24 Weeks, Mason Publishing 2002.